Hey there, so glad you popped by! I've moved to a new address, however, and you can find my new blog at: The Weaver's Apprentice as of Monday, January 26, 2015. I hope you'll come visit me there! See you soon! XOXO

Saturday, December 27, 2014

The Blues

It's been kind of somber and quiet around these parts for the past (almost) two months. I've been feeling frustrated since whatever it was that took wing inside me in the Fall that had me writing, painting, art journaling and cooking like mad seems to have faltered the last week of October, when Phiphi took a turn for the worse, and it's been gone almost entirely since he died.

I've also gained back some of the weight I'd lost and haven't done anything very active in almost two months. Britt and I had been going to Zumba (which I love...) twice a week, but we haven't gone since mid-October. I hate how easy it is to get out of healthy habits and how hard getting back on the self-care wagon is when I fall off... ugh.

We deep cleaned our apartment last weekend, which was nice. I've got some picking-up to do tomorrow, but it's still mostly clean. ^_^

Having a tidy apartment helps me feel less depressed, but once I start feeling depressed, it's hard for me to care enough to keep things clean.

I've slipped back into some of my bad habits the past two months, but I'm working on kicking them to the curb (again).

I've been trying hard to be kind to myself even when it's easier for me to be cruel... I've been taking lots of deep breaths lately and repeating nice things to myself under my breath. It mostly works (or I just sound crazy... who knows...) ^_~

I've missed blogging, but every time I've sat down to write in the past few weeks, there's just nothing. I'm just blank.

My usual hate/hate-slightly-less relationship with Facebook has swung back into the 'hate' side of things, so yeah... for whatever reason, I just can't find it in my heart to actually like that particular branch of social media. But I do like being connected to the people I like, so I keep my account and try to check it occasionally. ^_~

I ended up working all the holidays this year because my coworker is a selfish asshat, but there wasn't much to be done about it, so yeah.

We rescheduled Christmas dinner with Britt's folks for the 26th, and we just got back home. I ate too much... but we had a really nice time and I'm grateful that we have her parents to visit with. I am truly, truly lucky to have such great in-laws. ^___^

So yes... I'm kind of depressed, kind of irritated at being depressed and working on not being depressed anymore. And in my efforts to not be depressed (or irritated...), I'm off to finish cleaning up my kitchen... I made quite the mess this afternoon while making a white chocolate raspberry cheesecake to take for dessert tonight (it was sinfully delicious, btw... NOM)

I'm still working on revamping this here blog, but kind of thinking about maybe moving it to Wordpress? I don't know. I'm still figuring it out. Once I do figure it out, there will be fair warning before I do anything too terribly drastic. ^_~


I hope y'all had extra wonderful Winter holidays! I'm looking forward to the start of a new year and I hope that we'll see more of each other in 2015... Love and hugs!



  1. Sounds like we have a few of the same problems. I have been very hard on myself in the past and it is only now that I am learning to put my perfectionism aside and trying to be happy with imperfection, both of life and myself. I have to keep telling myself life does not have to be perfect to be happy, I just have to grab every happy moment I can! Do you have anywhere nice you can go for walks around where you live? sometimes getting out of the house can really get you out of your own head! And I save heaps of motivational pics from facebook because they remind me to remind myself I am awesome. My writing has been off since NanoWriMo, I think the pressure just freaked me out, I plan to start again next year with no pressure!

    1. Yes, Laura, I do have some beautiful places to walk near me. ^_^ And I do always feel better when I go outside and lose myself in nature for a while. No-pressure writing sounds good to me, too! =D

  2. I've found myself exercising less and sleeping more lately. I know that part of it is caused by the meds for the neurological pain, but a lot it's just me getting used to being in bed--not good, I know. Talking to people online and at home keeps me going. My Piano Man will remind me to write something when I'm getting too crabby (that has been happening a lot lately). A lot of it is because I'm rebelling against the routines I have to follow due to my current health (meds at a particular time, meals at a particular time, appointments at a particular time... it really annoys me, even though is not as bad as it sounds). I'm thinking about starting something for 2015 fifteen. A kind of blog project. Something very loose, but that might help me get into some kind of routine (when it comes to exercising, following healthy habits and writing at specific times). Who knows, maybe you can join and we can get out of this funk together. ♥

    1. Ugh, Magaly, routine meds and appointments would make me waaaaaaay irritable. I don't know how you do it, but keep it up, Wonder Woman! You're a badass. <3
      And if you *do* start any kind of bloggy-type project, count me in! We'll pull each other out of our respective funks indeed! XOXO

  3. Hopefully this New Year will bring renewal, hugs =)


Out with it!