Happy New Year, my sweets!
I, for one, am wholly thrilled to see 2012 done & gone.
This year is going to be great, I can feel it in my bones, my heart, every fiber of my being.
I had my Word for 2013 picked shortly after Christmas, and have been striving to live it every day since then.
Britt & I were driving in the car down James St. We'd just passed the Cruisin' Coffee & Trader Joe's. We were talking about our Words for 2013, and I was explaining that while I had an idea of what I wanted my word to embody, I still hadn't figured out exactly what the word itself was. And then the next thing that came out of my mouth was the word "Committed".
And there I had it. My Word for 2013. I felt everything shift. That last piece of puzzle fell into place & I felt like I was slightly moved from where I'd just been a moment before. I can't think of any better way to describe it. It was amazing and wonderful.
According to Dictionary.com, to commit means the following:
1. to give in trust or charge; consign.
2. to consign for preservation: to commit ideas to writing;
3. to pledge (oneself) to a position on an issue or question;
4. to bind or obligate, as by pledge or assurance;
5. to entrust, especially for safekeeping;
The last definition I especially like... I am entrusting myself with the care, health & well-being of, well, myself. I am putting myself in charge of my own safekeeping. No one is going to fix me, mend me, get me healthy or happy, but ME. So I am committed to doing so.
I am committed to letting this year be the year that I ditch my bad food & fitness habits & trade up for healthier practices.
I am committed to making time for myself & not feeling guilty about it. Time for me to do what I love, and do what I truly need to, to keep my physical, mental, spiritual & emotional Self healthy and happy.
I am committed to creating and taking responsibility for the environment I want to live in.
I am committed to live mindfully.
To whatever I want to do, and whoever I want to be, I am committed to do and be what & who I want.
This is a huge 180 degree turn for me. You see, I am kind of (totally) a commitment-a-phobe. Part of this stems from my eternal worry that I won't have the money to do something when the time comes to do it. This has happened innumerable times, so it's almost like I expect it to happen, which causes quite the anxiety when asked to commit to things requiring money.
However, I've realized that I base so many of my decisions on fear of not having, whether it be time, money, energy, desire, whatever, that I do nothing.
So this year I am facing my biggest hangup head on. I'm kicking ass & taking names and nothing is going to stop me.
I'm signed up for the Spartan Sprint in August that I've been yammering about since last year some time, and I'm actively working by butt off (literally!) to get in shape & get healthy. But, if you're interested in all that jazz, poke my other blog here, for all things fitness & health related.
We're only four days into January, and I am amazed at how different this year already feels. I usually hate the end of the old & the beginning of the new years. I usually am reminded that once again, a new year is starting & I've accomplished little to nothing of what I wanted to in the previous year(s). This year has been different so far. I was ecstatic to lay 2012 to rest & welcome in 2013... a year that I am convinced is filled with wonderful things, just waiting for us to discover or create for ourselves.
I feel refreshed, renewed and hopeful... I haven't felt truly hopeful for a long, long time. I have desperately held onto what I thought was hope, with the tips of my fingernails ripping & breaking & chipping away as things spiraled out of control. But what I have now, this is real hope, real positive thinking & real belief that this year is going to be amazing and wonderful. This year will be different. This year, I am committed, truly, undeniably, unshakably committed to myself and those I love.
And so, my dears, with a heart filled to bursting with joy & laughter & hope for a wondrous year, I wish you all a very happy New Year! This year is going to be amazing, and I am incredibly grateful that we'll be sharing it together.
Love & hugs & good night.